Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Just wasting time...

Just dropped off Theo for his first day of preschool. He's going to a small school in the neighborhood, just two mornings a week. He's been ready for a long time to start spending more time around other kids and less around his Daddy. I'm MORE than ready to have six hours of my adulthood back every week.

've been trying to figure out lately why I haven't had the urge to do any blogging or longer-form writing in general. In part, I know it's the amount of time I've concentrated on running, to the exclusion of other hobbies, but I think 'm also getting tired of being identified just as "Daddy," to the exclusion of other roles. I love my kid. He's a lot of fun to be with an I wouldn't trade the past two years. But having to be "on" pretty much every waking hour and parts of the sleeping ones leaves me without the mental energy and concentration for blogging.

Call me a whiny bitch or whatever, but I'm learning my limits.

But anyway, his first day: I was running a few minutes late, as usual -- we had to walk a neighbor's dog -- and then we managed to walk a block from the house before I realized I'd forgotten his extra clothes and diapers at home. At least it was only a block, right? That ate up all our extra time, so I carried him most of the way there so we could still be there with some time to spare. I figure I'll work on leaving earlier in the future, so he can walk on his own.

As we approached the school, I realized that it was the first day not just for the Monday/Wednesday 2-year-olds, but also for the older kids who attend Monday/Wednesday/Friday. The entrance was like a red carpet paparazzi lineup as people photographed and filmed their little ones arriving for their first day. I didn't bring a camera -- I really wanted to avoid making a big production of things -- and I just walked him directly inside to his classroom.

When we arrived, the teacher greeted him, introduced herself and pointed him in the direction of a box of matchbox cars...and I might as well have disappeared at that point. I handed over some paperwork to the teacher, loaded his cubby with extra clothes and diapers ... and it was time for me to go. I said "High five, buddy, see you later," and he barely looked up to raise his hand. Not even some crying from a couple other kids could faze him.

So, pretty anticlimactic, really. I look forward to seeing how he's doing in an hour, seeing what he's bringing home and what he has to say, but in the meantime I'm just happy to be alone, sitting on the patio at Starbucks and pretending that I'm an irresponsible layabout with nothing on my mind and nowhere to go... my future plans while he's in school include a return to brewing and finishing a few things around the house.

And if a mere two hours of relaxation can lead to a long blog post, there's no telling how much I can accomplish...


Anonymous said...

From one layabout to another (at least your hourly), welcome back. I missed you! It's good to write again, yes?


Le Sigh of a Fashionista said...

6 hours of extra time a you plenty of blogging time. No excuses now!

LindaWright said...

Missed hearing about your lives - glad you're back.

Scott said...

Micro blogging is where it is at.

You are still young and now that Theo is starting pre-school time for another! :)


Thomas Litchford said...

Yes, occasionally turning off the Daddy switch is essential to your sanity.

forge said...

"tired of being identified just as daddy"
Well, the solution for women who got tired of being identified just as "mommy" was that they should get a job outside the home. That is what we have been telling women for the past 40 years: that the only way to be a fulfilled, contented person who is realizing their potential is to have a career outside the home. I wonder if it is wrong to tell men the exact same thing? Is it possible to be reasonably happy dedicating your life to your family rather than focusing on a career? The evidence from women who have done it, seems to say it is not possible, and that the only way to have self-respect, independence and self-sufficiency is to work outside the home. As a result, as a society, we have encouraged women to work outside the home so much so that that attitude has contributed to creating a workforce that is now nearly equally male and female. Women today are expected to work outside the home both as financial necessity and as a means of avoiding the loneliness, depression, lack of fulfillment, and lack of independence and identity that many women have complained of as being the fate of stay at home moms. In the interest of equality, would it be unreasonable to suggest that the identical expectation should apply to men for the same reason?